“It takes a village to raise a child” became a controversial
topic in the 1996 Presidential election.
Hillary Clinton’s book and comment was met with some backlash from Bob
Dole’s campaign. He argued that it takes a family to raise a child. Mrs.
Clinton didn’t coin the phrase; it is actually an old African proverb. The line
caught hold to mean that when anything becomes too much to handle by yourself, you
may need others to help.
Caring for aging parents are no exception to this. I’m going
to be diplomatic and say both Mr. Dole and Mrs. Clinton are right. It takes a
family to understand the growing needs of aging parents, but many times it
takes those professionals outside the family to carry out all the needs wrapped
up in aging. The process of aging can be difficult not only for those aging but
for the family members as well.
If we look at aging from the standpoint of “it takes a
village” than we set the expectation that we need others to invite into our
families for a season to care for those things we can’t. We can make a plan to
choose our village wisely. Here are other things to consider:
o
Resolve that at some point you or your family
member will need assistance.
o
What types of things do you or your family
members need assistance with?
o
Personal care
o
Day-to-day finances
o
Estate planning
o
Transportation
o
Household chores
o
Shopping
o
Others
o
Is it a task someone in the family can take on
for a short term or longer term?
o
What is the budget for these things?
o
What will be your interview process and what
personalities and characteristics are you looking for in your village?
There are many businesses that are set up to help with all
kinds of services. Many of these companies want to build lasting relationships
that bring meaning to their work along with providing a valuable service. Don’t
be afraid to shop around and ask the questions needed to select your village
wisely.
