Down Sizing or Right Sizing?

Downsizing was a big term in the 90’s for cutting back the fat of corporations. It then turned into right sizing to get rid of the negative connotation of losing jobs. Downsizing our lives isn’t always positive either. It often comes at a time when we are not in control and our families are left to make decisions for us. Time to call it “right sizing”; only this will be a time to take back control.

My parents who are mid-seventies made this decision after my dad’s total hip replacement. Both of my parents are healthy but they realized that they didn’t want the hassle of the large home and the work that it takes to maintain. Their home represented many years of memories, treasures that were collected from amazing places, and years of successful hard work. For my sisters and myself, it came much quicker in our life than we thought and we were concerned about the process.

As we entered this time of right sizing, we realize quickly we weren’t on the same page. There were lots of questions, lots of emotions, lots of side conversations, and lots of anxiety. Three months later, my parents are moved into a nice duplex with exactly what they want and family incredibly pleased that the process is over. Let me share some tips that helped us get through.

1.     Communication is key to any situation and right sizing your life included. Let those that will be helping you or have a stake in the process know of your intentions. What do you expect from everyone? What are your children’s expectations?

2.     Goal setting while a business term is also important in the process. Do you want to make money on your things or do you just want to get rid of it or do you have things you want certain people to have? And what is the timeline you would like to complete the process? Based on the answers hire the appropriate professionals to help.

3.     Have fun in the process; this doesn’t have to be a time of tension. One of our final days in the house, mom went through her things with us and told the stories behind dishes, pictures, quilts, furniture, etc. We shared a lot of memories and now when I look at the pieces that I have acquired I have so much appreciation.

4.     Expect it to be emotional. Transition is rarely easy. Expect that there will be tears, hurt feelings, and laughter. Commit to being there and reassess if needed.

5.     Start fresh with the new place. Make memories in your new surroundings.

Right sizing can start small by giving away some of your precious possessions for presents. My mom started this tradition by giving us something she already had at Christmas. We will get jewelry that dad gave her with a short story of the event and feelings around it or dishes that were given to her by older family members that have passed.